Learning curve

There's always that question: how can you walk in those?! (which is aptly followed by: how high are they?!) Most of the time, practice makes perfect. Sometimes it doesn't matter how much practice I have, the shoes are never going to work anyhow.

I normally would never go for the "make it work!" attitude, because I love my feet and lack of bunions. I also worry if I go that route, that the shoes in question will just sit unworn in my closet. I typically steer clear of pointy-shoes for this very reason (I find they pinch my toes while alternately making my feet look huge). I can't seem to say "no" to the Pigalle, though.

They flirted with me and wore down my limp noodle backbone until I said "OKAY!" and hunted down a pair on eBay in the coveted (to me, anyhow) Blue/Black Leopard patent. I don't remember how long I searched for these beauties, but they showed up in my size-ish and I set up a snipe for more than I really wanted to spend "just in case".

So I sniped, and won, kind of forgetting I already own a pair of blue leopard heels. Owell.

Christian Louboutin Pigalle 120 in Blue/Black Patent

Fit on these is... huh. They were purchased gently-worn, but they do not appear to be completely stretched out. These are "toe crunchers" to be sure. These are a full-size down from my true US size, and the length is fine but the toe-box is killer. I think I would prefer the 120mm in a half-size down from my US size, and pad to fit. I have a narrowish foot, and they are still a bit narrow on me, so I definitely would not recommend these for anyone who has a wider foot.

Comfort is nonexistent. I only wear these when I absolutely know I will not have to walk more than car-to-door and will be sitting for the duration of wherever I'm going.

Oh Hey, Those Pradas

The ones with the floral heel? They're available in a mule version in a 39 on eBay.

Not my auction.

I stand corrected (or, okay I lied)

Well, I didn't really. I did say I had a pair of Zanottis on my eBay watch list, right? Maybe he doesn't need stopped, just... guided?

It seems as thought when Giuseppe Zanotti puts his name on shoes done for other designers -- the results are decent. Like I mentioned before, the Zanotti/Balmain collaboration. I didn't want to jinx it at the time, but I also loved the F/W 09 collection with Thakoon.

I saw these sandals awhile ago on Net-A-Porter. The general response "those are interesting" (meaning bad). I passed because they were still too expensive, but they popped up in my size for considerably less, so I dickered with the seller a bit and was able to bring these beauties into my closet.

A friend once told me I was a "drag queen in an anatomical woman's body". At the time I was like "..." but I get what he meant: I'm ostentatious. I like blingy, flashy, sometimes tacky and gaudy (okay, a lot of the time). If it doesn't go with anything, I'll make it go with everything.

These Mirror Mosaic sandals are done in a rich black suede (even though I usually hate suede, it's a very minute part of the shoe) and with honest-to-god disco fabulous cut glass mirrors (not just mirrored material). At first glance I worried about their delicacy, but at second I realized these shoes could be armor.

So, without further ado, my "inner drag queen goddess" shoes.

Giuseppe Zanotti for Thakoon Mirror Mosaic Sandals, F/W 2009

Fit on these is SMALL. Net-A-Porter claimed these run large, but I find the length to be true-to-size, but the width narrow. These are a 36.5, and they will work with some stretching, but the 37 would have been wonderful, and it's really unusual I find I need true-to-size for open-toe.

Comfort is so-so. They are 4.5" tall with a 1/4" platform (if you want to call it that). These aren't dance all night shoes, which is a shame because that's exactly what they look like they should be.

Parts Per Million

This is a shoe blog. But my stocking problem is becoming bigger and bigger.

I posted about my new favorite brand, Trasparenze, already, but here is why they are so awesome. These stockings. SRSLY. I even have to go to TXTSPK to tell you how amazing they are. The detailing is so lush and gorgeous that these pictures don't even do them justice.

The unusual pattern in-lieu of a solid cuban heel is what makes these hold ups, honestly, but then there is the seam and the pattern and stripes where they end on the leg. They are honestly lovely.

Okay, back to shoes. The Nine West "Vishnu" pumps are pretty great. Comfortable, not too tall (3.5") and very elegant. They are perfect to dress up or down an outfit, and there's something really sexy about a d'orsay heel, in my opinion. I bought these awhile ago, after seeing them posted on MakeupAlley, but they are still available in various colors online (and cheap!).

Trasparenze Lerici Hold Ups, Nine WestVishnu pumps in black leather

The fit on the stockings is true-to-size. I ordered size 3/4, because I generally like to size up in stockings (I think they lie about sizing), but these are actually slightly big on me. The silicone (?) or whatever is in the stay-up part of the stocking fits rather nicely, though, and does not fall down despite the sizing.

Fit on the Nine West heels is large. These are a US 6.5, and I could have sized down to 6 even.

Hosiery, Parts IV-VII

It's getting warmer outside, but I've got a new cold-weather obsession: suspender stockings. It's like a little bit of "bad" that may or may not peek out from under clothing. A version of sexy that perhaps only you may know about, but makes you feel that much more sassy knowing the secret.

I love the look of garter belts and thigh highs, and these make said look even easier. I prefer cut-out stockings, but also love the trompe l'oeil look. I found a good selection of these at mytights.

First up, is House of Holland. These were first posted by Lindsay on a fashion thread and I had admired them quite a bit. An unusual take on the garter silhouette, with a house at the "clasp", these are sexy and unique.

House of Holland for Pretty Polly

Trasparenze, a brand I had never heard, of was talked about on the Purse Forum. A shoe collection thread was posted with intricately detailed thigh highs and I wanted to seek more from this brand.

These tights the brand are a gorgeous take on the fashion.

Trasparenze Renella Tights

Charnos offers a simple, elegant garter/stocking combination that is easy to wear as well.

Charnos Boudoir Bodyfree Suspender Tights

These nylons by Pretty Polly don't have the illusion of garters transposed on them, but the mock holdups are quite entrancing.

Pretty Polly Absolute Legs Mock Holdup Tights

Mytights sizing is pretty accurate on the website, but I did find the House of Holland tights to be a bit smaller than their "one size fits most" suggests.

Sidenote: I am desperately looking for a pair of suspender tights that started my obsession. They are the "Lucrezia Borgia" style from the brand Trasparenze, and if you are able to locate these on a site that delivers to the US, please let me know!

Giuseppe Zanotti needs to be stopped

I thought about making this an April Fools joke, how much I love some of Zanotti's creations, but I got lazy and I couldn't bring myself to even joke about loving these shoes.

Giuseppe Zanotti has created some beautiful shoes. Some I've even coveted, to be honest. I like the stuff that has been done for Balmain (for the most part). I love the latest advertising with women stepping on men in hot shoes. I appreciate the cheekiness.

Let's get real here for a minute though. Racked already covered his blingy dollar-sign shoes and bullet sandals, but there are so many other atrocities out there. It's kind of become a thing now where I can instantaneously "spot the Zanotti" by how ugly the shoe is. Is he playing a joke on us? Trying to see how far fashionistas will go to be "in style"? I sometimes think Marc Jacobs does that.

First up we have the bedazzled sandals for spring! Available at Bergdorf Goodman, for a price I didn't even bother to look up because you couldn't pay me to wear these, these are like Easter confections from hell. I know what you are saying "could you do any better?" Yes, yes I could.

Giuseppe Zanotti Jeweled sandal, S/S 10

The boots (available at Barneys) upon first glance looked really nice. Solid shape, nice details. Then I turned them around. OMGWTFBBQ? Why? Were they not heavy enough? Did they need some pastel-colored bling for spring?

Giuseppe Zanotti Jeweled Boot

Not nearly as bad as some of the other shoes I've seen out there, but I can't imagine the shame I'd feel wearing what looks like a DIY belt buckle on the back of my heel.

Size + fit = Not available because I'd be embarrassed to even try these on.